Dark edges of transformation
Hi, if you’ve chosen to read this article, you already know what you’re going through. You understand the breakdowns that occurred in one or more areas of your life served as a trigger for the transformation process.
What you didn’t expect, though, was the timing. You feel that a large part of you is no longer who you once were. You’re convinced the new version of you is about to begin. Opportunities appear, inspirations, ways out that help you gain momentum, and you think: this is it, I’m ready to take off!
And then, even those seemingly new possibilities dry up. They vanish.
Weariness and discouragement sneak in.
“Why did I even start this?”
“What was I thinking when…” (you can finish the sentence your way).
All of this happens while those people still present in your life speak a different language. Maybe you once shared a similar perspective on life, but thi one feels like a solitary journey.
Sometimes new people arrive, sometimes old ones return, but often the path you walk together is short. While you keep shedding skin after skin, you realise that many prefer a part of their life to remain unchanged.
The path toward authenticity is wonderful in terms of personal power and inner truth, but in practice, it’s rough.
So, you shout at the Universe:
“Enough!”
If that’s never happened to you, let’s be honest: you haven’t even dipped your toes into the waters of real transformation through catalytic events.
You find yourself in a liminal space that keeps you suspended and throws you into your own depths, as well as those of the Earth. The new is partly there… What exists around you, however, cannot contain your awareness or its expression.
Everyone who didn’t choose this path falls away or is removed from your life. Nevertheless, it’s not just people. It’s everything.
Emblematic for me was last summer.
After coming back from a holiday full of transformative encounters and events, I opened the wardrobe doors to put my clothes away… and I no longer recognised the clothes hanging there. I knew I had bought those clothes, but they didn’t represent me anymore.
It wasn’t about fashion — that’s never been my motivation to buy new ones and change.
They simply didn’t express who I was becoming. They looked like remnants of an old role.
That moment brought me straight into contact with the threshold and its space.
By now you know, it’s like going through a portal, and that in-between is already part of you. You step into it and face what’s unknown.
Can you feel it, that tightening in your belly? Those thresholds to the unknown… right?
You realised it long ago: the answer isn’t “raise your vibration.” It’s not “ascension”.
No.
The answer is alignment, with your authentic vibration, your essence.
You’re relocating entire layers of yourself to a new axis.
Picture it like a spinning top. The more it spins, the more it activates, acknowledges, expresses parts of itself, until it takes off, into your new life.
Each layer has its own nature. Each must be tuned.
You’re like a hummingbird, shifting directions constantly. You move forward, then back, then forward again, a kind of dance.
In this dimension, for our mind and body, we experience it all in a linear timeline, with a before and an after.
Here that linearity is necessary for awareness to settle in the body. Just as the body needs it to adjust to the Earth’s changes.
Sometimes, it feels like you’re on a rollercoaster of emotions, even if only for a little while. Your mind isn’t used to this slow-paced initiation and wants to label everything quickly. That’s part of the game too. Those moments are pauses and recalibrations.
If you’ve learned to identify your inner patterns, you can go through those emotions that surface, the ones closest to the body.
This is not a mental or mere energetic transformation.
This impacts you in your totality.
Imagine yourself as a volcano. It’s your essence and matter pushing upward, trying to emerge. It’s not about techniques, exercises, or well-behaved spirituality.
It’s you. You’re not channeling anyone.
You are giving birth to yourself.
Your healthy boundaries are vital. Your essence, like a dragon chained deep down in the depths of the Earth, growls or hisses in your ear and tells:
“Listen to me.” They demand coherence.
In 2022, I heard their message that felt like a thunder in my ears:
“Your house is not a house for disbelief.”
It was a reminder: I could not row against myself. I am my first home, and then…Then the rest goes without saying.
Don’t hold onto those who don’t believe in you. Don’t surrender your axis, your centre, to anyone. It is crucial for you to acknowledge your sound, your name. Your ancient, deep name.
You are not here to be reshaped by rules or visions about you that no longer make sense. You are not here to repeat cycles of the past.
Going back is not an option
You speak a different language.
Have you noticed how exhausting it is to keep one foot in the old world? People who hold on to it keep the volume of distortions high in their ears so that they do not listen to themselves or take action. Confusion and weariness are familiar and comfortable. Change is frightening. They come close to you, because a part of them glimpses the new, but then instead of choosing themselves they either turn up the noise volume or try to change your sound.
Will you let them do that, becoming the perfect match to their intentions? That compromise becomes a constant betrayal… unless you are exactly who you are now, with no distortions and open passages to those who don’t build their own bridge.
It wears you down to give up who you are for fear of being alone.
On the threshold. Isolated.
Maybe standing at the edge of the unknown.
Yet, each time you leave behind those who cannot walk with you, you get closer to your own nature.
It’s not a distance between you and them.
It’s the distance between you… and yourself.
And now…you’re coming home.
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