In my world of possibilities, future and present blend into a single time that, as I’ve always perceived it, moves like a spiral.
Over the years, messages, intuitions, and confirmations of events that would later unfold in adulthood began to arrive. This is how my mind works when I’m connected to who I truly am: my soul, my being.
When the mind serves the soul, instead of recreating the future based on past experiences, a new space opens up. It is there that our authentic nature can emerge. It is there that wonder manifests here, in this reality lived fully with the body.
Knowing that my sense of time isn’t linear but present and spreads across multiple levels, brings me joy. I feel a sparkling emotion light up. My mind, and me with it, relaxes.
Today, when I look at certain events from the past, I recognize that I had already glimpsed fragments of my future: information, visions, and symbols that once seemed out of place or difficult to grasp have turned out to be essential. They’ve become confirmations, answers to questions I asked myself more recently.
And this nourishes me. It brings satisfaction.
I have already mentioned some of the events that occurred in my childhood in the section Early Contacts. I perceived the presence of different Beings. There were Spirits, and Beings from other worlds and/or dimensions (aliens) . They were there, in my room.
They seemed to move across different layers. Some had a more physical density or consistency.
Some scared me… no, I would rather say, I was afraid of some of them. Some spirits of people who had transitioned seemed to scream, almost frantically, trying to get my attention. I must have been about 5 or 6 years old.
I would tell them to leave me alone, and sometimes I’d ask other Beings present to step in between me and the more troubling ones. I asked them to protect me, to act as intermediaries.
A whole different chapter involved some interdimensional Beings. As I understand it today, I believe there were two distinct types of contact. However, this distinction is influenced by the doors closed to contact in different moments of my adolescence. The experiences began in the same way, with their arrival in the house, but then the sensations changed (I haven’t done a regression yet, but since May 2024, more and more details have been surfacing).
With some Beings. let’s call them the “first ones”, I immediately felt at ease, even when I only sensed their presence in the room. Images would form in my mind in relation to the shapes I could grasp. The feelings were empathy, calm, joy. The Beings felt familiar. It felt like a game. Then I would fall asleep. What happened next unfolded in the astral realm, as far as I remember. Those images are still vivid, even though the first encounters happened when I was still a child.
Then there were the others. The “second ones.” I don’t believe they were the same, because the reaction of my body was entirely different. However, if I now go back through my memory and search for their vibration, I can’t entirely exclude that among the ones who made me feel calm, there was one with a different frequency. It’s like a sound reaching the ear: a diagram with a spike off the chart, marked by a force, a presence, an intensity that I associate with the second group. That presence , which I perceived as masculine, also felt familiar, but different. He stood out and was always by my side. He waited until I was ready to open the door to my past through shamanic practices, but his presence always went far beyond those practices, which were not necessary for our interactions to take place within this reality.
Let’s go back to those experiences, the rather scary ones that I believe made me constantly confront all the emotions I felt to go beyond the limits that the mind, fear and conditioning were already creating To tell the truth I don’t think they expected all this from a child, they created a reminder, the bogeyman to be faced at the right time to free myself and express my authenticity as an adult, when I would be able to embrace, my, our connection Definitely what I felt in their presence, indeed, as soon as they entered reality, it was anything but calm. I would sense their arrival even before they entered the house. It was night. I’d wake up. A strange silence would suddenly fall over the house, as if a dull sound or snap outside had torn something open. Something became fully present in reality. Everything was dark. I don’t remember lights, only the rustling of feet on the floor… but that darkness seemed different, as if a film had covered everything. The air, or maybe the structure of space itself, seemed to have stretched.
I’m not talking about the apartment, but the fabric of reality itself. Fear would start to rise in tides within me. Hearing the rustling without seeing anything didn’t help. I felt someone approaching. More than one “person,” and one in particular stood out. They were coming closer to the bed.
I couldn’t see anyone, neither with my physical eyes nor my inner sight. I can say it now, the lack of control over the situation made the fear skyrocket.
Back then it was just fear. Fear that I interpreted as fear of them. In the words of a child: “I was afraid they were bad.” Again: those were my thoughts, conclusions drawn from fear. When their presence reached my room and the fear peaked, bam, I would fall asleep.
Among the memories that surfaced this year, there are some still tied to my early childhood, connected to the episodes described above (I’d say around 3 or 4 years old).
The dynamic was similar, but I received images. Always the same ones, each time. A kind of lid would open (even with other Beings there were what I called “holes in the wall”), but in this case the dominant sensation was fear.
I saw a path to follow, a series of tunnels that descended across many levels, deeper and deeper… and then I’d fall asleep.
I’d shift from wakefulness to those images, and then immediately into sleep. Once, I tried to walk toward them, toward the thought that always formed in my mind: “Here they come, they’re coming to get me.” I wanted to be brave, I wanted to see. But no use. Once again, sleep arrived first.
As I grew up, the memories became fragmented.
Now I believe they were intentionally veiled by those Beings, waiting until I was ready to handle the connection. For years, all of this remained cloaked in fog except the fear. Fear of a connection that felt frightening, magnified over time, and tied to those memories. “There’s something bad. And they’re coming to get me.”
As an adult, I tried to investigate those memories, but they had become impenetrable. Neither I nor anyone else could access them. When someone tried, they saw nothing. Just darkness. A gentle way of saying: “There is nothing here for you.” Others couldn’t read anything from me at all: they got lost in what they believed were channeled messages, but which were actually just echoes of the mind’s spirits, projections of their own beliefs. It was clear they couldn’t understand. They would only have added distortion.
Everything began to unlock shortly before the wave of change that invested me at the end of 2021. Before then, it had to remain fragmented. I had tried to explore it alone through shamanic journeys. I saw images, and also “animals” that I interpreted them as symbols of something else, even though they were related to me.
In 2019, I had an experience almost identical to the ones from childhood. I didn’t understand right away what was happening. I thought it had happened to help me transform the fear from the past and let it go. But it wasn’t like that.
The real meaning and the memories were still carefully guarded. As if a threshold said: “You shall not pass here.” I wasn’t ready. It wasn’t yet the time to embrace the authenticity of that contact nor its beauty.
It was only the beginning of a story that would be told later.
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